We're so happy, even when we're smilin' out of fear

It's pretty obvious, we all live in fear, fear keeps us back from doing a lot of things. When it comes to certain things I definitely take everything into consideration first then analyse it which probably sets me back.

I've definitely been terrified of things my whole life and self doubting myself constantly.  Which has probably stopped me from doing things that actually I can achieve.

Fearful that I'm not good enough, smart enough, pretty enough, brave enough, that I'm not enough.

I've let these fears rule my life, projecting them into my relationships with friends, families and even affecting my future relationships. I'm a very friendly and happy person, but it takes a long time to fully warm up and trust people on a close level. I can be a closed book as I only select out what chapters to let people read and discover about me.

Circumstances have changed though, I've realised that life's too short and with a little push from friends and family I need to be brave and move away from the emotionally unavailable person that I am.

These are words to live by, as living in fear isn't living at all.

Kiehl's Canlendula herbal- extract toner

So to begin with my skin is combination- oily and normal, prone to blemishes and a bit sensitive, so when trying skincare I do have to be careful. This toner is one of Kiehl's top sellers and I can see why. Inside it has wonderful soothing ingredients, even flower extracts too. Alcohol free and super soothing to use, I've repurchased this three times now- so this is definitely my holy grail product now! It has very gentle and soothing ingredients, perfect for even the most sensitive skin too. Also if you return the empty bottles back to Kiehls, you get a stamp to save up for some free goodies!

Life Lately- Anxiety

source

Firstly, here's one medical definition of Anxiety (bare in mind that there are many types and levels)

'Anxiety is a general term for several disorders that cause nervousness, fear, apprehension, and worrying. These disorders affect how we feel and behave, and they can manifest real physical symptoms. Mild anxiety is vague and unsettling, while severe anxiety can be extremely debilitating, having a serious impact on daily life'

I've always been an extreme worrier and anxious person, I always brushed this aside thinking it was nothing or just a personality trait, until a few years ago.

During my second year of University, I kept on getting panic attacks nonetheless terrifying when you're by yourself trying to calm yourself down. But still, even back then, I didn't realise that other people suffered with it too, and it is becoming more well known now, which is good. It's never good to suffer in silence.

How to describe living with anxiety? This post describes the emotions that I can feel in one day-It really is a rollercoaster of emotions.

Nowadays, my anxiety is still with me, it always will be, I get anxious about the smallest things that probably wouldn't bother anybody else, but that's okay. I've even had a panic attack between the MTR lines before too. Hong Kong has a frenzy of people and it does get a bit too much for me sometimes.

But the most important thing I've realised from this is that some days when life just gets too stressful or exhausting, take a day away from it, whether it's spending the day with your loved ones, going out or staying in- do something for yourself. 

For me? I love staying in, blogging, watching television- this is my happy little corner. Life lately has gotten pretty hectic for me, I crave the days where I get to go home and just be in my comfort zone but at the same time I do enjoy the busy lifestyle. Find a way that makes you happy when life just gets a bit too much.
If I get a panic attack or anxiety attack when I'm outside or in a social environment, I find a quiet corner amidst the loudness to calm myself down, if I can go outside- that's even better as I've found fresh air to calm me down quicker.

Aside from this rambly post, I wanted to alliterate, be a bit selfish, make time for yourself, take a day off from it all because at the end of the day, you have to take care of your own happiness and health. That's the most important.

https://www.anxietyuk.org.uk/

Fitness Journey: Month Two

It's the 8th already?! Feels like yesterday when we wrote our first Fitness Journey post, but we've come quite a far way since then.

I think we've both done quite well, Soph has been keeping to a weekly gym and running schedule, covering more distance each time. I've ran my first 10km marathon and it didn't kill me. To keep the ball rolling, we've both signed up for a 6km one in March, and will probably keep doing marathons as a way to motivate us to run consistently.

Looking back at our aims from the last month, we did not achieve dropping a few kilos, but we do feel that our tightest jeans are now looser on the waist. Our colleagues have noticed some changes in us too. The 45 seconds plank is no longer a torturous challenge to me (but still a painful one), and I'll be aiming for 50 seconds this month. Sophia no longer feels that much of a strain on her legs when running, thanks to leg extension training.

 

Things to improve on:

• Keeping to running 12km per week (now I cover around 9km)
• Strictly no snacking on biscuits during work hour. Stash up on some fruits/nuts instead. Also no food intake after 8:30pm on weekdays.
• Build more on the core - meaning more crunches, planks.
• Drinking more water- my water intake needs to improve more.
• More leg training- leg extensions, squats
• Weight training- we've started with 2kg for our arms

Sophia: I started doing moving push ups which are a killer for arms and the core. I had a mini achievement goal of mine completed this month too. There's one section of the park that I could only previously run halfway through, now I can run to the end and jog a little on the way back. It's things like this that has really made me happy with how far I've improved compared to when I ran for the first time ever. I'm looking forward to moving up my running, instead of aiming to do a certain km per month, I've decided that each time I run, I'll try and run a little bit longer than usual to push myself more. But I also know when to stop as well, if you feel like it's getting too much, you can take a rest. Next month is my first marathon, I'm pretty nervous about it but excited, it's things like these that pushes me. Physically there might not be any major differences, but I feel a huge difference in myself and I want to keep pushing myself to achieve these goals.

"The only person I want to beat, is myself"

Inspirations this month:

• @sugarrandspice on IG. She's a Nike Influencer, and constantly inspires and amazes us with her creative (and impossible) workouts on her page. 
• @heyclaire on IG. Just because she has such a sexy figure and i absolutely ADORE her fashion sense. She makes me want to have a more toned figure so I could also look good in those clothes.
• @blogilates on IG. Cassey has a bubbly personality that motivates you to keep working out.